Understanding Moments XII. Seasons of Sakura
Summer Moon
Sakura Hasegawa was a little child back then. She used to be overshadowed by most of her students in the Mujushin Ryu dojo. She had this slender body and Japanese eyes. She was a silent type of child, never wanted to mingle with other students. Yet, her greatest attribute was her keen sense of understanding of the situation she is in and her instincts and intuition (Jintsuriki) abilities are always near to correct. This has been Sakura’s greatest gift of insight and awareness. Even though she can easily be one of the best students in her dojo, her humility and keeping a low profile keeps her just below the ranks. Her master understands her awareness, from keeping a low profile and grounded, she was never picked upon by other students in the dojo. Her master truly considers her one of a kind that embodies the Mujushin Ryo discipline of avoiding unnecessary conflicts.
She shouldn’t be underestimated by her opponent. Her looks and stature is always deceiving to an opponent. She might appear weak but her spirit and heart is greater than most students in the dojo. Even with Akira san. Once, during their fight with Inue, second of the best students, she dashes on the lower right side of Inue and with one swift upward motion of her bokken, a wooden sword, she hits the wrists of Inue pushing her sword in an upward direction. In another continuous motion, Sakura slashed on the back side of the right knee of inue causing her to bend and kneel over the tatami mat. The fight ended on that moment as she draw her wooden sword on Inue’s neck as she stood on her back. Her master then asked her, why not go directly to her heart or neck on the first strike. Her response was, “I don’t know.” Then she smiled and helped Inue up. On the rest of the matches, she lost continuously.
Akira-san was there when the duel of Inue and Sakura was held. He was in awe of her quickness and her style. He was clearly blind to see what she is made of and what she is capable of doing. Even though losing continuously after that match, he was bewildered of why did she lose to the average students. Clearly there was something he didn’t understand. Was she losing on purpose?
In Sakura’s heart and mind she was actually contented. She won already over a top student and she didn’t need to fight anymore to disgrace other students. Clearly she was next to Akira in their style and fighting techniques but if she chooses to duel with Akira, in her heart she would still choose to lose the duel. Akira is akira. Sakura is sakura, that is the way it is to be. She will be lost without following Akira, so to her…he must remain on top as a leader. So to her, losing doesn’t matter – she knows her place and nobody can take it away from her.
From then on, Akira never wanted to underestimate her fragile appearance. In fact, in countless battles they’ve gone together, she is someone that Akira relies on so much. She also specializes in Ninyaku or a master of healing and special medicines. In any raid, ambush or battles even Sakura keeps her place on the sidelines healing other people. There was also a time when Akira was wounded on the leg and Sakura helped her walked and kept him comfortable and healing him. Wiping the sweats from the painful wound he acquired.
On one fine day, while Akira-san and Sakura-chan are on their way back to their dojo to report a successful mission of protecting a village from bandits in Edo, Akira taps Sakura on the back.
“I just wish you are a man. You can easily be my best friend.” And he moved walking fast infront of Sakura joining with his team that protected the village. Sakura gave of a smile and blushed not knowing what to say nor think about Akira-san’s comment. She is clearly fond of him but she is unsure if he will like her for her.
On that same night, while they were on the halls of the dojo meditating, the light on the halls suddenly went out. Akira instantly grabbed Sakura’s hand. She didn’t know what to feel at that moment. She was surprised but felt that light feeling inside. They rushed inside a darkened room as arrows penetrated the rooftops. He held her in his arms. She felt good about it. As the assault stopped and the arrows ended, there was a light being brought by the master to the room. The other students was a bit surprised that Akira-san was holding Sakura in his arms, protecting her…yet their hands never parted. The students laughed while others move to search for the assailants that assaulted their dojo.
Slowly and slowly, Akira started to fall in love with Sakura-chan. But both are unsure, so he wanted to find out if she feels the same way as his.
 | REDISCOVERING FALL On the wooden hallway, they sat down. Akira and Sakura. Sakura-chan
was playing the flute while Akira san was thinking of Ayame. Her memory
was so devastating to him that he at times stare at nothingness. The
melody that Sakura played caught Akira-san's ear. He turned to look at
her. Her eyes was closes as she was playing and he stared at her like
for the longest time. He noticed her small face and her small lips. Her
beauty is hidden from the world left to be discovered. He sees it and he
clearly sees her beautiful face. |
She opened her eyes and caught Akira-san's gaze.
"Huh?....What's wrong?"
"Ahm, nothing Sakura-chan...well, ahm....i wanted to know something, if you don't mind."
"Sure, what is it?"
"Can you lift your hand just like this?" He drawed out his hand to hers with his palm up and she followed.
"Like this?" She said.
"Yes, just like that." Then, he moved his hands towards her. His hand palm was facing down was hers was facing up. He didn't want to touch her hand. Just enough space between those palms of theirs is enough to understand something.
"Sakura-chan... do you feel the same way as I do." Those were the only words he said, he didn't want words to be drawn out to hers, just enough nod and look is much more better.
Sakura-chan nodded and smiled.
"Okay." He said. Then he took off his hand and smiled back at hers.
They went back to their usual thing that they were doing. Sakura continued with her music. He stared into space again, only this time...Sakura was on his thoughts.
COLD WINTER
"I'm leaving, Sakura-chan."
"Why? Did I do something wrong?"
"No. There's something you are not telling me... about him. "
"Him? You're jealous, why would you be jealous."
"No, its beyond that. That's the third strike of something. You know I would usually let things pass, I am not keen on trying to dig deeper into your own secrets. But it would be comfortable for me just simply to know my place. Nothing else."
"I'm leaving you. I'm sorry but this is something I need for myself."
"No...no...no please. I do not understand what you are saying Akira-san." She was crying and a little bit confused.
"It seems you like him, Sakura-chan...or more than that. Forget about me, told you I'm not worth it all."
"He? What do you mean...Shiro? Is it about him?"
Akira-san, kept his silence. He didn't want to fight or argue just because there is someone else involved. To him if the person stays, then its all good, if the person wishes to have another, they must pursue it rather than force themselves to stay with him, just because they don't want to loose him. To him, he understands that people should take their own journeys just to find their place in this world and what they really want. To him, he just wanted her to be more honest with her feelings because he never judges people, he tries to accept no matter how difficult it is. He then turned his back on Sakura.
She held his hand.
"Alright. I'm going to tell you something....about me."
"I am not the person you think I am and if I tell you so, I'm scared.....that I might loose you." She said slowly.
He turned back. He was willing to listen.
If only people could trust people
that they can be accepted
no matter who they are.
Her tears fell one by one as she said her story. She opened to him like a book full of mysteries to be uncovered. He didn't despise her nor hate her, he was more of saddened how life could have led her in those ways. Truth is, it is not about the people and their selves that made them. The people and events that abounds them makes them who they are. He is more saddened of the thought that he is helpless to help her or heal her.
When he thought she was just fragile and vulnerable and weak, he realized she was more broken, wounded and helpless.
Then she knelt down on the ground...crying. "I was raped over and over again by someone I trusted too much...even as a child." When she said those words, he was filled with rage and sadness. Akira-san knew the person too well who violated her. He wanted to run down to him and cut him severely into pieces. His hand was shaking. He was motionless and speechless but his heart raced and his thoughts went as dark as the oblivion. He never knew that the innocent looking Sakura-chan, so reserved, so soft-spoken and cheerful had carried in her one of the most painful memories a woman could carry. Now, how he abhor men who is filled with filth and has no respect and value for women. He has drawn his samurai sword from his scabbard. His look is dim...his breath....marks death. "Look, I'd rather have you stay with me rather than be with other men who will just be good for nothing. I can't carry thoughts of you being with another man who will just mistreat you...I will blame myself fully for that...simply for not protecting you and being there when you needed me most. I will blame myself everyday of my life."
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SPRING BLOSSOMS
unfinished...
